Student Work: 10 HOURS by Monty McCormac
Our grade 7 students were recently tasked with writing an original scary story that featured foreshadowing, suspense, and descriptive writing. The submissions received by our teachers were nothing short of amazing! The stories were spooky and readers were definitely on the edge of their seats while they were shared around the fire pit last week.
One stand out story was submitted by Monty, a budding author who shows tons of talent at a young age. He has given CMA permission to share his story with our whole community. Happy Reading.
TEN HOURS
By Monty McCormac
CHAPTER 1
Simon had agreed to go see his old friend, he wouldn’t usually go to a meet
up. But he was promised money from his friend. Simon needed some
money because his career was on a downward spiral and his bank account
was running low. Simon got out his white Prius uber car and walked down
the stoney path to the unwelcoming blood red manor house in the rain, his
short messy black hair getting wet. Simon was from Jamaica so he wasn’t
used to this kind of weather, and neither was his capuchin monkey, Tiki.
Once they got inside the huge red manor house they looked the place up
and down, Simon looked at Tiki, they shared a look of uncertainty and
walked to where they heard laughter and where they saw light. Tiki
screeched a screech a monkey would make but he tugged Simon’s green
plaid shirt and pointed his hand to the dark upstairs. They saw a pair of
white dots that looked as if it was staring at them, “Simon!” said a lady
joyfully. His attention was drawn to a lady in her forties with blond hair and
peach white skin, she was wearing a black dress and pearl earrings. She
trotted over to Simon and gave him a massive hug that seemed to
suffocate him “Hi Angel” said Simon as he hugged back. He took a glimpse
upstairs and froze, his heart thudding against his ribs, his eyes stretched
open. The dots were gone, and so was his mind.
CHAPTER 2
It was seven pm and Simon was sitting at a round coffee table on a
grey couch next to another old friend by the name of Hugie Jackburn, a
man with black short hair and smooth white skin. Sat across from Simon
was Angel’s husband Grey Rumstit. He was a gentle man with curly blond
hair and sky blue eyes. Throughout the conversation they all shared a
bottle of red wine. Angel and Grey kept kissing. Simon had a bad feeling
about Grey, as if he was using her for the money, “I am going to get some
more wine. You boys don’t get too unBEARable in there” said Angel walking
into a different room, exaggerating the bear in unbearable. Without Angel
the conversation died out, causing an awkward silence. Simon couldn’t take
his mind off of the eyes, he thought maybe he was hallucinating. He tried
focusing on the lion head taxidermy but it made him feel even more
vulnerable, there was an almost microscopic red dot in the mouth of the
lion which made him stare at it. The air was struck with a deafening shriek,
and not Tiki’s. Simon, Hugie, and Grey charged in the next room to see if it
was Angel in trouble… She was there on the floor, eyes torn out, jaw on the
brink of falling off, and a huge claw mark that seemed to go into the skull. It
was a horrid sight to see. Hugie and Grey rushed to the scene to see if they
could help in any way. Simon stood there and did nothing, he wanted to
help but was paralyzed in shock. Simon looked up and stared into a dark
room down the hall and realised he wasn’t hallucinating. The eyes were
back.
CHAPTER 3
Blood was pumping out of Angel’s throat and face. Or what was left of it.
Grey and Hugie were putting their hands and cloth on the bleeding areas,
shouting back and forth what to do. Simon knew no matter what they did
nothing would fix her mauled face. He looked down the hall again and saw
the eyes disappear into the dark. Without hesitation he chased after them,
Tiki tried to stop him but he just fell off. Simon was sprinting into the
blackness of the manor house, pursuing whatever this thing was. It was
moments later until he realised how far into the manor house he was, “lost
it” Simon muttered. The sound of a thunderstorm was brewing fast, rain
was speeding up and clouds were covering the stars of the night. Darkness
coated the room, spreading like tar. Nothing was clear to see. The room felt
alive as a low growl travelled around the house. Simon decided to give up
and head downstairs, but just as he turned around the manor, lightning
struck, making the room bright with light and revealing a short look at what
the eyes belonged to. A creature with black hairless skin, the appearance of
a muscular bear with giant clawed hands for paws, A bear skull that looked
like it was attached to its face, and a frighteningly large amount of sharp
teeth. Simon nearly wet himself, for even a glimpse of the monster was too
much. Simon bolted out of the dark room with the monster hot on his tail.
CHAPTER 4
Simon’s heart was racing, he had been scared of monsters in the dark when
he was a kid, but he had never been scared of monsters this much. The
monster was darting after Simon, biting at him, trying to get a hold of Simon
so he could tear him apart. No matter how Simon ran, the monster never
caught Simon, it seemed to taunt him as he ran through the dark rooms of
the manor house. Simon could not see obstacles in front of him until it was
too late, and like an old lady, the stairs had become an enemy. Simon lost
his footing and tumbled down a flight of stairs. Hugie and Grey hear
something fall down the stairs and hit each one. They had given up on
saving Angel when they couldn’t get a phone signal to call for help and had
now raced to see what fell down the stairs. “Simon!” shouted Hugie reaching
his arms out to help “run!” he shouted Simon leaping away from the stairs
just in time for the monster to miss Simon and make a thunderous thud on
the floor and breaking it. Tiki jumped on Simon with a warm “I’ve been
worried about you” type of hug, Simon just kept running With Hugie
following behind. Grey hesitated for a second, numbed in fear, and ran into
a chair in the living room.He caused it to fall over with him in it, leaving him vulnerable.
The monster grabbed the flipped chair and loomed over Grey,
bearing its teeth before piercing its claws into Grey’s stomach
and sinking the rows of teeth deep within Grey’s head. The
monster viciously yanked Grey’s head from side to side with
blood scattering across the room with each sway, the teeth
working in a wood saw like method. Grey hollered in pain and
agony, the screams travelled around the manor like lightning as
the monster ate him alive. Simon and Hugie didn’t have time
for sorrows, the only thing they focused on was to get out,
away from the monster. The house was like a maze. There were
dead ends, loops, and ongoing sequences, Simon felt like he
was going to have a heart attack with all this running, he started
to slow down.
CHAPTER 5
Simon tripped on the crinkly carpet just in front of the
door, slamming into it headfirst. Simon felt hazy, everything
was blurry, Simon couldn’t get up. Hugie was far behind so he
didn’t take the turn Simon took, Simon could faintly see Hugie
running past with the monster behind. The monster stopped
and took the turn Simon took, and made eye contact with him
before charging at him. Simon struggled to get up, it hurt and it
took all the muscles in his body just to get on one knee. With
each second the monster got closer and closer. “Come on!”
Simon shouted at himself as he felt like the heaviest man in the
world. The monster took an enormous leap at Simon, jaws wide
open. Simon collapsed with exhaustion and fell to his side, just
dodging the monster and making it break down the front
doors. Simon looked outside with even more horror than
Angel’s death. A film set. With everything a film set needed
except stars, because there were none. Simon and his friends
were.
EPILOGUE
Simon and Hugie were on a game show (the red dot was a
camera) that was streamed once a month where four to five
participants would unsuspectingly get drugged and put on set,
The participants would have to survive in the house for ten
hours to win one-million dollars.This was the third ever
episode, and the last. Simon sued the film company in a court
case that took weeks on end, but Simon was successful. Simon
didn’t see any of the episodes because he didn’t have a TV and
other regular household items, that’s why he went to the
house, for the money. Simon got one billion dollars winning the
court case for which he used half of to help Hugie with therapy.
Finally the monster was killed, along with the satanists that
summoned it. All of it was over…
THE END